The freedom, it burns!

PITTSBURGH (AP) – Gov. Jeb Bush got a rude welcome to the city when he came across several anti-Republican protesters on his way to a fundraising event for U.S. Sen. Rick Santorum.

Authorities said Bush was briefly ushered into a supply closet at a subway station Friday, retreating with a security guard and a female aide to get away from the protesters.

Something about that "briefly ushered into a supply closet" phraseology just kills me. But I suppose, there are only so many ways one can attempt to spin "Jeb Bush hides from protesters in a skanky subway supply closet before appearing with Rick Santorum" into something dignified:

• Before hordes of enthusiastic likely voters, Gov. Jeb Bush paused on the way to a campaign engagement Friday, ducking into a dark, enclosed space so he could symbolically re-emerge into the glorious light of freedom.

• Gov. Jeb Bush joked with a crowd of protesters Friday, feigning a search in a subway station supply closet for stores with which to re-stock his brother's dwindling job approval.

• Gov. Jeb Bush deliberated with top aides in an undisclosed location Friday before headlining a fundraiser for Sen. Rick Santorum.

• Gov. Jeb Bush attempted to restore the GOP's image Friday by ducking into a supply closet not with a teen boy page, but an adult female aide.

• Gov. Jeb Bush made a last-minute wardrobe switch Friday on the way to a fundraiser for Sen. Rick Santorum after aides pointed out his visually interesting tie ran a serious risk of overshadowing the substance of his remarks.

• The family curse struck again as shoddy intelligence on North Korea's nuclear test caused Jeb Bush to experience a momentary loss of resolve before a campaign stop Friday.

• Jeb Bush lived every politically literate American's dream Friday as he retreated into a supply closet and asked aides not to disturb him until 2009.