Confection contention! (Oh, yeah!)

If you thought wounding of group pride produced useless, petty things like "freedom fries" only among domestic patriots fanatical about their foodstuffs, as usual, think again: In Iranian bakeries, Danish pastries am become "Roses of the Prophet Muhammad" to solidify opposition in the noble medium of dough to cartoons originating in Denmark that blasphemously depicted the patron of Islam.

I think we can all agree that when a cultural, ideological, political or religious "debate" devolves to the point where it's being instantiated in a squabble over what to call a particular puff pastry, humanity has extracted everything of even nominal use from the discussion it's going to extract.

Peoples of the world, it's over. Just move on already.

Wait, what's that? Oh, no, bitch, you di'int just disrespect my popover...